So much going on. Things are still super hectic with work. Honestly I shouldn’t even be taking the time to type up this post, but I just needed a break and to vent a little.
I’m definitely feeling pretty burned out. Work has been crazy busy and I rarely am finding any time to take a break, even for lunch. Plus I’m putting in a lot of hours from home too. I’m trying to keep on top of my son’s school stuff and keep him in the right direction, I’m not always being successful though. I’m still doing the pool league thing, and still have both leagues going on right now. That’s really killing me. There’s only 3 weeks left of our Monday night league though, then I’m dropping that one. I was so glad to take 2 days off work for my birthday, it was a much-needed rest!
Besides all that, things are staying busy at home too. T and I have gotten so much done in the back yard (as you saw in my garden pictures!). Plus little changes around the house and planning projects for inside. A is still around all the time too. Things are going well with T living with me. I’m really happy about it and so is she. She’s not planning on going anywhere soon and feels totally at home. It’s so nice to see her happy and relaxed.
Things with A are a little different, we’re definitely getting into a bumpy area. And thus, that is where I’m unsure about things. It’s not helping that my stress level at work is making me a bit less tolerant of little things. But the thing is, we are so different! I know, differences can actually be a good thing. But not always.
The big thing is, he’s so sensitive. Ok, I know what you’re thinking, don’t girls want a sensitive guy? Well, sure. But there’s a limit. He is really over-sensitive. I mean, I get annoyed at him over something small and he’s ready to pack up his stuff and head home in the middle of the night. WTF?
It’s a lot of things. Another big one is that it sometimes feels like he’s the girl in the relationship. He like sappy chic flicks. I hate them. I love going to Home Depot and planning little projects around the house. He hates DIY stuff and has no real interest in it. I like going out and doing stuff on the weekends. He would rather just sit at the house. (We haven’t gone out on a Friday or Saturday night in like 2 months now) And that’s just a few things! The list goes on and on.
It’s not to say there’s nothing good. He gets along with my parents, my son, T and my animals. He still believes in chivalry (although a little too much at times). All in all, he does try hard to treat me well.
But the fact is, I’m not a girly girl. I think on one hand he likes that, on the other he doesn’t. I don’t know that I can be what he actually needs. And the more I get to know all the little things about him, I’m not sure if he can be what I need. I don’t want someone who’s going to try to control me, but I sure as hell don’t want to have to pander to someone’s every insecurity either.
So I guess the question is, what do I do? Do I keep trying or cut my losses?